It’s no doubt that this performance of his leaves me contemplative. This guy…he’s blown my mind volcanically over the last few weeks: slowly, steadily, leaving long-lasting damage in its wake. This song was a delicious ode to the emotions that were consuming me. When I say they’re about to burst, it’s because I don’t feel there is a word to concisely describe what’s coursing through me.

This guy…there’s something about this guy. This copper-haired crooner with the voice of a worn man singing about the pain and hardships he’s endured over the years. But who is he kidding? He’s just a kid, like me. A goofy, innocent kid who has this beautiful, innate talent to reel you in and keep you on his melodic line.

It’s crazy; I’m 16. Six-teen. Sixteen. 6-teen. No matter how that’s written, the word “teen” is still in there and I’m at a loss for words because the books and the songwriters say I’m still too young. Funnily enough, I wholeheartedly agree with them. “She’s still too young”, he lyrically mused. That song was a painful love letter to me. The universe is right, but my heart says it’s wrong. I’m in an abyss and I’m stuck here. I can’t be moved. I’m thinking of all of our exchanges: the fleeting looks, earth-shattering smiles, and the hugs. Oh the hugs!

And no matter how innocent they may seem to the world (literally), it’s my testament. I’ve tried to keep it at bay, under wraps; but when you can’t help it, you really can’t help it. It’s my own way of saying “I’m here. You have me. All of me.” And I pray that he’ll want it one day. I pray that he’ll want me one day. He’s consumed me and I’m in a state of bliss.